….. Caught my wife in toilet with stranger, man cries out, Seek Help
AI-generated image for illustration.
Dear Bunmi, not long ago, my wife of almost 20 years went to a birthday party of one of her friends. I don’t usually go with her, since parties like the one she attended are more of a ‘girlie’ type.
Anyway, days later, one of her friends let it slip that my wife really went wild at the party.
My wife is a bad drinker and, apparently, a lot of booze was available at the party and she must have had more than her limit.
Anyway, she ended up kissing a much younger man at the party and both of them were eventually caught being intimate in the toilet!
When I confronted my wife, she looked really frightened. She said she was really drunk and didn’t know when she ended up with the stranger.
She said she’d never done a thing like that before in her life, and promised not to do it again.
She has completely destroyed my self-esteem with her thoughtlessness and my marriage has been violated. Is there anything I can do to come to terms with what has happened?
Dear Bunmi, my first instinct was to send her packing, but we have five children and they completely depend on her.
Mike, by e-mail.
Dear Mike,
It’s true we all do things we regret under the influence of alcohol, but your wife’s behaviour is shocking, to say the least.
Why didn’t her so-called ‘friends’ stop her when they realised things were getting out of hand? Why did your wife drink so much, knowing she couldn’t handle it?
I’m assuming you think your wife’s behaviour is out of character, but what is surprising is the ease with which she transformed from a loving wife and mother into a seductress.
It’s a giant leap, being intimate in the toilet, knowing she might get caught.
Alcohol might make us lose our inhibitions, but it’s rare that a person behaves so radically differently from how he would normally behave when sober.
The first thing to do is make sure she’s checked up for any STI, since she had it unprotected. The difficult part is to confront what was really behind her action.
Is she bored with her marriage? Your wife certainly crossed many lines. She cheated and did so without a thought she might be caught. No wonder you feel destroyed and violated.
Any decent person would. You need to get good counselling either from your church, or from a good professional. The road to recovery wouldn’t be easy, but you need to make an effort to save this marriage. Good luck.
Share your problems and release your burden. Write now to: Dear Bunmi: bunmsof@yahoo.co.uk
Vanguard News
